Now that I have your attention...
Listen, you have greatness inside of you! Period! Leave no doubt that you are an incredible person. You are not defined by your failures. You are defined by your ability to bounce back from failure. We fail or way to success. A toddler falls its way into walking. Every time a little child learning how to walk falls, they cry sometimes. They lay there and put for a minute sometimes. Sometimes they may even really hurt themselves. But you know what... Every time they get back up and try again!
We have gotten older and forgot to get up! Oh, you WILL fall! That is a given. It's your "get up" that defines your character. I have not made time to write over the last three years. I have been growing. I can sit here and write about all of the wonderful things that have happened to me since I last wrote to you. I could be ridiculously positive and tell you how I have traveled over 100,000 miles in the last three years. I have been around the land now known as the United States two or three times. I have started my doctorate after completing my Masters in Business Psych, with a focus on Cognitive and Behavioral Neuroscience. I have been a part of multiple panels and Boards. I have served as Chair, Vice-Chair, and as a member on critical Boards. I have been a part of three synthesis projects for the aviation industry. I achieved three of the five certifications I have always wanted. I graduated twice and also had three of my kids to graduate from both college and high school. I moved to two incredible trendy cities, according to society. I have made incredible friends. I bought a home and two new vehicles. I planted a raised-bed garden with over nine different vegetables. I made incredible new friendships and the business network exploded into a global presence. I have done speaking engagements across this country over the last three years in DC, Chicago, New Orleans, Las Vegas, Portland, OR, LA, Baltimore, Miami, Atlanta, Nashville, Seattle, Boston, and more. I make more money than I have ever made in my life. I started two podcasts. I started another business. I'm about to buy my second home. OK! OK! Ok... so many more great things to focus on and write about here... YAY ME!
But you know what - Woop-dee-doo! What does it all mean? I am living out things I dreamed of doing. I still have more on the list of goals. However, I get some of them done, and you know what - I find myself always wanting more. When does it stop? Better yet, when does satisfaction start? The Biblical question runs through my mind - "What does it profit a man to gain the whole world and lose his soul?"
During this same time of achieving these incredible things, However, I have faced challenges at a whole new level. I have been faced with incredible racism in the workplace. I have had arguments with organizational leaders for how they treat people. I have lost several relationships with family and friends. I've been almost evicted and had repossessions. I have had utilities turned off for non-payment. I gained almost 30lbs. My PTSD and anxiety have been off the charts. I have cried in frustration in front of my boss because I was so enraged at the mistreatment. I don't sleep well at night. I failed classes and course work. I withdrew from classes this summer because there was too much pressure from all sides. I have had major challenges with family relationships.
No! It ain't easy, but it's worth it! Is it? Is it really? This is where I am right now. I love positive energy. But does being positive mean I have to have all of these possessions? Does it bring me happiness to travel like I have? I have been to over 30 countries and 46 states. It's taught me a lot. But - what am I missing if I face stress daily? What am I missing if I cannot process the anger I feel dealing with horrible people. If the Law of Attraction exists, where are all of the positive people and why are so many hateful people around me?
I have realized another Law within the Law of Attraction. Not only do you attract like minds and kindred spirits in people, but the negative people will see your light too and will gravitate their darkness around you. No one told me that! People have made it seem like this life of success will be sunshine and rainbows! Now, while these people are not in my circle because I put them there, they have been placed there. So guess what, you will have unwanted guests in your life trying to screw things up for you! I believe in "Still I Rise" by the Late Dr. Maya Angelou. I believe in the "By Any Means Necessary" per Malcolm X. I believe I have "Overcome" some things as Dr. Martin Luther King dreamt I would. I believe in the "7 Habits of Highly Effective People" Dr. Stephen Covey thoroughly documented. I believe I can "Brave the Wilderness" as Dr. Brene Brown encouraged me to do! But damn, these negative people get on my nerves, I am still not happy!
I think about Robin Williams and how he shocked the world by committing suicide. We sit back and think, "He has the world in his hands! How could he feel so alone in this world as much as we loved him and take his own life?" Anthony Bourdain of CNN was traveling the world and going to some of the coolest places in the world. He met incredible people and the experiences he had were not enough to let him know we appreciated him and needed him with us. Amy Winehouse sang our hearts happy with her incredible voice and beauty - but yet, substances took control of her life that was cut too short for her followers.
So back to my earlier questions... Is "it" (success) really worth it? What does it profit us in the end? Does being positive mean being successful? Does being successful mean you're happy? Does chasing your dreams give you everything you ever wanted? If so, then why do we keep wanting more?
I was asked this question and it left me speechless. "What are you chasing? What do you really want?" I was asked this question two months ago and I still do not have an answer. I have goals. I have plans. I know exactly what I am working towards. But the question always comes - "What's next?" Therefore, what exactly am I after? What do I really want? After we get our basic needs, according to Maslow, of food, water, warmth, rest, safety, security, friendship, sex, esteem, and accomplishment - what else do we want? Self-Actualization is next. This is the fulfillment of our greatest potentials that lie dormant in each of us. I told you, you have greatness inside of you, leave no doubt! You have a passion burning inside of you - without question. Your greatness and passion have NOTHING to do with material possessions! Your greatness and passion attract like minds and kindred spirits. But beware! They also attract darkness in other people! Do yourself a favor. Take an inventory of the people in your life. Do an inventory of what you have accomplished and failed at over the past 3 years. Write it all down. Who's new in your life? Do they add value or suck the life out of you with their negative ways?
Once you complete this task, circle everything that needs to change immediately! Get it out of your life. Then, highlight everything that needs to go but will be more of a challenge. Plan your exit strategy to get them out of your life. These items make take a little longer but make a plan anyway. In the meantime, find ways to search your inner being. Give yourself a physical, mental, and emotional hug every day. Look in the mirror every morning and say these words out loud, "I really really love YOU!"
Be open about the darkness around you. But, give more time to the light. Recognize this, we are surrounded by darkness. Space is dark. Light emanates from the heat and fire on the inside of the sun. But, the sun is suspended in darkness. Without a solid matter in space, the sun has nothing to shine upon every day - except darkness. It would just be a ball of fire surrounded by darkness. Therefore, shine anyway and find the "matter" in your life to shine upon - despite the darkness being so dark around you - shine-on!
No, it ain't easy, but it's worth it! It really is worth it!
Be magnificent!
EM3
www.iamem3.com
